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Monday, April 29, 2019

In sickness and health

     Almost 11 years ago my husband and I took each others hand in marriage. I recently heard that the choice you make when choosing your husband or wife is one if not THE most important decisions you make in your life.  I would add only second to choosing who or what you put your faith in. I had dated several but not many guys before Jay and I met. One was a nice guy and one was a extremely selfish guy... and then I met Jay.  I instantly fell in love with the way that he spoke with other people. I am sure one of the first things I noticed about him, while we were working together in a running shoe store, was the way he listened to people talk and tell their stories along with the way he responded to them. He was not self absorbed and this was evident from so early on in our relationship. One of the other things I remember from early on was when he stopped into the shoe store on a Friday evening before we were even dating. I think he was picking something up, he was in a white T-shirt and was on his way to go see his little sister's dance recital. So now, not only was he interested in strangers, he was supportive of his family.
     All this to say when you are 22 you don't think "sickness" will come if you've had a healthy childhood. You are still in the invincible stage of your life, your back is fine, your knees do not hurt, no chronic illnesses have come knocking on your door. You say the words during the wedding not knowing or really taking stake in the fact that one day, you'll be sick or your spouse will be ill. One day you may be helping them do things physically like tying their shoes, helping them put on deodorant, putting their hair in a pony tail along with taking much more of the responsibility in the house and with the kids, more laundry, more dishes, more meals. 
     When you make the choice at 24 or any age you are are choosing a personality and heart that will be either be selfish when you need them or selfless when you need them. I am so thankful and blessed that my heart connected with my husband and something in me told me (listen to that inner voice young ladies) not to settle for anything less than a selfless spouse because one day they might be putting on your shoes and socks and washing your hair after a bout of "sickness". 

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